Gatekeeper II Chronicles 23:19

Today's chapter in the book, "Loving our Kids on Purpose," talked of being gatekeeper of your household. Danny Silk used the illustration of gardners who fence their gardens as opposed to gardners who don't. The deer invaded the gardens without fences. The owners of the fenced gardens were able to enjoy the deer in their yard as they fed them instead of the deer feeding themselves. There is definitely so much here. I am sure I need to mull all this over. What I saw right away was that how I set boundaries in my home will predict how big of an intruder can make it's way in. According to this story of Joash becoming crowned King, Jehoida thought that the protection of who and what came in and out of the temple was directly related to the King's relationship with God. How amazing to know that boundaries are freedom!
The story I liked best from the book today was the "Fun or Room" story. He used this story to show how he instilled self - control in his toddlers. When they would act out, he would say, " fun or room." His point was that either we have fun around each other and respect that there are two people here, or we can't be around each other. The first time he did this, his toddler went to his room. They started throwing their tantrum, etc. He went in and said, "fun or room." They finally got his picture and said, "fun" and this phrase ended up being all he would have to say if his toddler acted out.
Here's one for teenagers that looks too simple; but probably works. He gave a few one liners like this: "Probably so", "I know", "That could be"; to give teenagers when they say, "It's not fair!", "This is the meanest thing you've ever made me do!", etc. I don't have teenagers; but I hope I am in control enough when my teenager is disrespectful to use these. In the book it says that these statements say to the teenager that I am going to manage me while you struggle with you. The moment I show how I hate their disrespect, I lose the battle.